IT'S PARADE NIGHT AGAIN!

2. YOU'RE ONLY WASTING YOUR OWN TIME! Maintaining good behaviour

I suppose that, as officers or helpers, at some time or another we have all gone home from BB feeling rather discouraged by the bad behaviour of our boys on a particular evening. Fortunately for most of us a good night's sleep results in the imaginary letter of resignation remaining imaginary.

Anyone who works with children and young people soon realises that the Biblical concept of "original sin" is right! Some may fondly reminisce about the good old days when children spoke only when spoken to. Did those times actually ever exist in the BB? Some may blame the apparent increase in indiscipline among young people on television, schools, society, parents or………

However, to be effective in our work, and for our own peace of mind, we need to ensure that our programmes of activities take place in a calm and ordered environment. We need to balance the need for enjoyment against the need for discipline.

Ask yourself this question:

"Do 1 sometimes feel that I am not totally in control of my boys?

"If you feel that the behaviour of your boys could be improved then you may like to consider the following thoughts:

1. In my experience the behaviour of boys is sometimes a central question in Anchors and Juniors where boys are sent by parents, and generally less of a problem in the Company Section, where a boy is quite likely to leave rather than become a nuisance. Is that your experience?

2. I doubt whether the comment "you're wasting your own time" is actually effective.

3. It is unusual for all the boys present to misbehave at the same time! Learn the names of your boys so that you can quickly identify the boy who is misbehaving and take appropriate action with him. A quiet word with the boy means the rest are not disturbed and the boy in question does not lose face. For overt disruption you will probably need to remove him from the rest. Emphasise that the misdemeanour is "bad" not the boy.

4. Avoid confrontation and sarcasm.

5. It is too simplistic to suggest that misbehaviour occurs if a boy is bored. Nevertheless consider your programme: is it varied, challenging, relevant and, above everything else, enjoyable? See leaflet 7 in this series.

6. Be well prepared and have all material to hand. Anticipate problems.

7. Consider having a set of rules or code of conduct. Should this be drawn up by yourself or should you involve the boys? Could this be displayed? Could it be sent home, perhaps with a welcome pack when a boy joins?

8. What action will you take with a boy who does not keep to the rules? What options are open to you? Think this through beforehand. Whatever you decide stick to it. Boys will almost inevitably test you to see if you mean what you say. It is important to inform parents from the outset if you are concerned about the behaviour of a particular boy.

9. Consider having a points system where good behaviour is praised and rewarded. Display the results on a chart/board where the boys can see them. Although the presentation of an award to the "Best Boy" at the end of the session is traditional, consider short-term rewards as well, say after a month. Ensure the boys will appreciate the reward and know what it is!

10. Do not shout! Use a whistle sparingly!

11. Instead, consider having a signal ? a short blow on a whistle, a clap of the hands or standing in a particular place when you expect the boys to be absolutely quiet.

12. Develop a series of unobtrusive control actions so that the programme is not interrupted: eye contact and facial expression finger to lip hand signal to sit down beckoning finger nod of approval shake of head to express disapproval

13. If you find it necessary to tighten up on your rules then be patient! Your boys will probably take several weeks or months before they accept them.

14. Finally, and perhaps most importantly, take time to get to know your boys and build up relationships with them. Pray for them by name. See also leaflets 1 and 4 in this series.